Saturday, October 06, 2007
10:56 PM
has mar clashed onto earth?
has human even learnt how to learn?
--
so what's wrong with ppl now a days?
or maybe i should just put it this way,
"what's wrong with me?"
i'm NEVER RIGHT.!
NEVER.!
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give and take.
who the fucking hell has ever tried to give and take?
everyone has their own problems and ways of doing things.
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if ever i have a wish for this family(hell i'm living in),
i'll ask for a ma who can carry out the basic "respect",
better communication skills,
refresh her wooden block thinking,
open up the mind,
dont think too highly of herself.
and in fact,dont give birth because the government encourages you to do so.
because if you fucking cant make sure that ure able to raise any child up wit no BAD CHILDHOOD memory,den fucking dont fuck.!
den after 18 years,dont stand shouting at me that i owe you my 18 years of life.!
because if i ever can choose which family i can go,
i'd rather go to some 3rd world country,with a family that can carry out "love".
not to mention how fucking much you had money in your mind,
claims that ure providing us sufficient when you don keep dinner for me when i've trgs,
and expect me to survive on a 5 bucks per day,
complains that i didnt give you any cents when i take up holiday job.
when after paying debt to you,70% of my salary is gone..
not to include that i'm still alive[too bad,NOT DEAD].
i need to fill my stomach when i'm working,and i've to pay them all.
so i don even how how lil do i have left.
--
and respect does not only comes when you need me,
or when you feel like it.
being angry at me because i spend my holiday on basketball and not taking a holiday job?
so who fucking even cares if i can survive this holiday.?
i just didnt put that goddamn money sign on my face.
becasue i really hate the word "money" to fill this bloody house.
you asked me:"so basketball can earn you a living?"
in fact,u didnt ask,you shouted at me.
i wonders,so i'm suppose to bring more money to lend my pa to pay his soccer bet?
why actually can one scolds others when they themselves didnt play their part?
so you think your twelve hundred per month is giving us a good life,
and to EVEN think that YOU DIDNT WANT TO PROVIDE US to further studies,
why dont you take a look 20years back.
why betray ah gong's trust and uses his money to go gamble?
then loses every single cent and have to walk home?
--
now you scold and even CURSE me,
blames it on basketball,i cant bring you any money.
but why use me as ur vase and boast to ppl that i'm once in the u18 sqaud.?
and then comes home and curse me and basketball.
so you think all these comes so easily?
for the pass 6 years..
every single step i ran,
every single lay-up i went,
every single shot i made,
every single punishment i accept,
every single drop i sweat,
every single scolding i remember,
so who understands how much every single step,lay-up,shot,punishment,sweat and scoldingS
that i've been through.?
and how much does any point or two means to anyone when i've been thru and understand the importance of EVERY SINGLE POINT OR TWO?
put it in : confident up, trust up,points up,more hope and higher chances of winning,
give it a miss : demoralize you and your teammates,more tiring,more mistakes,LOSE THE GAME.
maybe just one day,i should wake up forgetting that:
i need to be responsible:
that i can skip trg or choose to do anything else,
come to trg and not train with my heart,
go to game and miss an important shot and laught,
make a miss pass and GIVE WAY to opponent to fast break us,
not talk and keep quite on court,den defend someone who is already defended by someone.
then lose a game or two,
and continue going out with and celebrate with not even a single trace of guilty.
maybe just one day i should.
--
who ever in this life doesnt make mistakes?
and there're millions and billions of ways to teach,learn,remind,show.
sometimes,using harder words doesnt mean negative,
and using nicer words doesnt always means positive.
why cant ppl just wake up,like really WAKE UP?
learn to LEARN.!
nobody's gg to stop and wait for you,
its the fact that everyone moves on with or without.
and the fact that ure better,u'll play longer exist.!
what have i not been through?
i'm .. .. ..
a kid who knows NOTHING ABOUT BASKETBALL,
to a C' div player,
a C'div vice-captain,
a B'div main 5,
a B'div vice-captain,
a B'div captian,
a both north zone and national colours award winner.
SO?
i'm also.. .. ..
someone who doesnt know how to dribble,
someone who doesnt know how to lay up,
someone who doesnt knoe how to shoot,
someone who is a women's open bench player who warms almost 40 min through out the season.
someone who is no one to this fucked up basketball world.
GROW UP,and GROW OUT of ur comfort zone..
that's what that i've been trying to..
--
so tell me,
whose gonna fucking care about my shit.?Labels: i'm NOT living my life..
